I'm Clint Eastwood. Actor and Director. Born in San Francisco. In my early acting career I was criticized for my stiff manner and squint. I took that criticism, chewed on it, and then did those things forever. It's my acting style. My propensity for silent "f*** you" looks made me the perfect choice to play Dirty Harry from the Dirty Harry movies and the Man with No Name in Sergio Leone's Dollars trilogy (including A Fistful of Dollars and The Good, the Bad and the Ugly). After getting fed up with directors wasting my time, I decided to show 'em how it's done and made quite a few pictures including Million Dollar Baby, Mystic River, and Unforgiven. Won a few awards. Oscars mostly. During the 2012 presidential race, I showed up at the Republican National Convention and talked to an empty chair as if President Obama was sitting in it. It was the most hilarious thing that's ever happened. Do you feel lucky, punk? I'm not quoting one of my characters, I'm genuinely asking if you want to get shot or not.
Waa-taaa! My name is Bruce Lee. I am an actor, philosopher and above all, a martial artist. I was born in the Chinatown neighborhood of San Francisco and raised in Hong Kong. The streets of Hong Kong are rough like sandpaper, my friend, a certain number of confrontations with the local gangs are… unavoidable. The Wing Chun (Snake-Crane) style of martial arts revealed themselves to me through years of study, and eventually I created Jeet Kune Do (the Way of the Intercepting Fist). Keeee-yaaa! To brag is unbecoming but my physical fitness was unparalleled. I could land a punch in about 5/100ths of a second, do two fingered push ups using only one hand, and deliver a punch with explosive force from just an inch away from a target. As an actor, I made martial arts movies like The Big Boss, Fist of Fury and Way of the Dragon that changed the way action movies were made and gave me a fame most potent. Of my many on-screen battles, the most epic was certainly with my own student, Chuck Norris. I died of mysterious circumstances in 1973 and it was either due to a family curse, a delayed reaction to a Dim Mak (death touch) strike received weeks earlier, or possibly maybe an allergic reaction to a painkiller with aspirin in it. Haaaa-waaa! Be like water, my friend.