Bow before me! I am Cleopatra VII Philopator! Queen of the Nile! The last pharaoh of Ancient Egypt! No mortal can resist my charms! A member of the Ptolemaic dynasty! (That mostly means that my parents were also siblings.) I originally ruled Egypt jointly first with my father, then with each of my little brothers, Ptolemy XIII and Ptolemy XIV. As part of that whole deal, I had to marry my brothers and that was... well, you know what they say: "You can't have a dynasty without getting a little nasty." When Julius Caesar visited Egypt, I had myself smuggled into his bedroom in a big rug and, when the moment was right, jumped out to surprise him. Nine months later, our son Caesarian was born and Caesar was helping me take control of Egypt for myself. I was 21 and he was 52! When my beloved Caesar was assassinated, I teamed up with Mark Antony to fight the assassins and oppose Caesar's legal heir. Well, one thing led to another and we had some more kids. After we lost a few key battles, and with the enemy closing in, I committed suicide by cobra bite and died as the last pharaoh of Ancient Egypt.
Ooh! Actress, Model, singer, international sex symbol. I'm a quadruple threat! Hehehe. And to think, I started out as an orphan named Norma Jeane Baker. I'm the original "blonde bombshell"--and my hourglass figure graced the cover of the very first Playboy magazine! Men simply adored me. I married baseball player Joe DiMaggio and playwright Arthur Miller (he wrote the "Crucible", which you probably had to read in high school)! I was rumored to have affairs with Robert Kennedy AND President John F Kennedy. Do you think I did? Watch me sing "Happy Birthday, Mister President" to JFK at Madison Square Garden and then tell me what you think. Stop it! You're making me blush! I had quite the acting career with movies like "Some Like it Hot" and "The Seven Year Itch" where I stood over a subway and let the air blow my skirt up. It was delicious! Despite my history of famous loves, I remained childless until my death in 1962. Although the official story is that I died of a barbiturates overdose, there are rumors that I was murdered... A lady never tells! Elton John wrote a nice song about me called "A Candle in the Wind" but then he reused it for other people like a dozen times. Thanks Elton!